If you want to be successfully sober, it pays to put some time and energy into planning your day. Jo explains why setting your intention in advance reaps huge rewards in the early days of stopping drinking.
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Jo shares four tips that help you to stop drinking more easily. By using the right approach to changing your drinking habits, you can make life much easier on yourself.
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Jo describes having a bad day and gives a bit of a reality check. When you live life sober, life still throws the same crap at you, you just end up handling it better. The bad days sober are still better than the bad days when you're drinking.
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Jo explains the importance of finding different ways to nourish yourself when you stop drinking and gives some examples of the kinds of things you can do that will keep you strong, focused and motivated.
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Jo describes what Sundays used to be like when she was drinking (the crippling nature of her hangovers) and contrasts this with the joy of Sundays now: hangover-free and full of energy.
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Jo explains that trying to stop drinking doesn't work. There needs to be a commitment to doing it or not doing it - "trying" is just an excuse to not bother. As Yoda famously said, "Do or do not. There is no try."
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Jo describes how a comment in the pub prompted a moment of shame and explains how, the longer you stay sober, the more you become removed from the behaviours, the shame and the guilt that your drinking brought you. And, you pave the way to becoming more of the person you want to be.
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Jo reassures you that it is possible for you to actually not even desire or want a drink, even when it's being poured and drunk in front of you. You can be surrounded by people drinking and not give it a second thought. As impossible as this might seem when you first stop drinking, with practice and the right mindset, you can do this!
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Jo explains how getting sober can be scary at first and how, when you practise for long enough, and let go of the "what-ifs", you relax into it and it ends up being an exhilarating and enjoyable ride.
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Jo describes having to deal with an unexpected mouse infestation and notices that dealing with what life throws at you is so much easier when you're sober. She describes how alcohol used to get in the way of standard everyday things on her to-do list, let alone unexpected crises!
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There was the time I woke up shivering and fully clothed in the driver’s seat of my car. I was parked outside my house, the sun was rising and I had no idea why I was there or what had happened the night before... Jo explains why we keep reaching for alcohol even though drinking keeps bringing us misery and why we need to figure out the positive intentions behind the drinking so we can stay sober more easily.
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Jo responds to an article about AA (Alcoholics Anonymous) which caused some angry and defensive reactions. She suggests there is space for different approaches to stopping and more than one way to reach a happy and fulfilled sober life.
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When I stopped drinking, I suddenly developed a craving for ice-cream, chocolate and cake. Weird, because I’d never really been into sweet things before. And, it turns out I’m not the only one. It’s a well-reported phenomena that some people find themselves reaching for the sugar when they get sober. Jo explains what you can do if you find that sugar is your new best friend when you get sober.
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Do you ever get that Sunday Morning Envy feeling? When you look at everyone else going happily about their Sunday morning business and can't imagine ever feeling that good on a weekend morning? When it seems like everyone else is part of some other, sober, happy species that you'll never belong to? Jo shows you how amazing it feels when you stay sober long enough to become that sunny Sunday morning person...
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Jo explains how, when you remove the barrier of alcohol, you get to become more self-aware. You get to notice and recognise more of your thought processes and behaviours for what they are. If they're unhelpful to you, you get to do something about them.
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Jo describes some of the pressures people feel when they first stop drinking and are being encouraged to socialise in environments where they're surrounded by alcohol. She compares her first visit to a pub when she was sober to a recent pub experience and reassures you that it does get easier as you grow in confidence. Eventually, you don't bat an eyelid or think about drinking at all.
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Rather than thinking about drinking as giving something up, it can be more helpful to think about getting sober as a huge gain that adds value to your life. Jo describes what she's noticed about how being sober has added enormous value and how it's the opposite of deprivation.
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Jo explains a concept that can help you stop drinking more easily. If you're worried about going into certain situations sober, thinking about things in this way can help you stay strong in the face of fear and anxiety.
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Jo describes how much her work performance was affected by her drinking. She explains how, since she's been sober, her productivity and performance has shot through the roof. How much has your drinking been affecting your work performance?
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Jo explores the strengths and weaknesses of Step 4 in the 12 Step Programme and suggesting that asking people to stand in judgment of themselves when it's likely the people you're asking are already perhaps their own harshest critics could be less than helpful.
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Jo explains some of the different ways alcohol stops you from getting the life you want and being the person you want to be. And, how it's only when you stop drinking that you get to start feeling good about yourself and sorting your life out.
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Picture the scene: The sun is going down over the green hills behind a little white-washed Spanish town. Cool, grey shadows are creeping up the walls on one side of the street and I’m sat outside a little bar with my mum and dad, all drinking soft drinks: Jo describes how your confidence grows the longer you stay sober.
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Jo describes how it can sometimes feel unfair when you look at other people enjoying a few drinks and you wish that you could do the same, about how it can sometimes feel like you're losing out because that you can't do this but that you don't have to feel this way when you recognise that life is all about making choices that work for you.
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When I was drinking, I used to watch other people enjoying themselves without alcohol and be jealous. I used to think that I was different somehow and that I couldn’t do what they were doing: Jo explains that living life happily sober is just a question of practice and you can do it!
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What do you do with all the alcohol in your house when you stop drinking? What do you do when someone gives you a bottle as a gift? How do you cope with your partner/family drinking and storing alcohol around you? Jo explores some of the options around what to do with booze when you've stopped drinking.
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Today I want to share with you some words from a sober blogger – I think some of what she says might make sense to some of you. Some of it struck a chord with me: Jo talks about the importance of believing it's possible to live life happily without alcohol and to willingly choose not to drink.
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Jo describes an upcoming trip and how liberating it is to approach it sober. Being free of dependence on alcohol (whether it’s physical or psychological) removes a barrier to experiencing life and gets rid of the waste of energy that goes into hiding that you have this dependence.
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I've just woken up on a cold, crystal-clear Sunday morning in the UK: Jo describes how and when she decided to stop drinking and live life sober and suggests that when you use your imagination to conjure up the future sober you you want, you make it your reality - you make it come true.
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When I think about my life sober, there is a sea of realisations that wash over me one after another. But one of the biggest and most significant is this: life sober delivers everything that alcohol promised and then denied me. Jo explains how everything you want from alcohol is only attainable without it.
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How many reasons did you have up your sleeve?I had many – these are just 10 of them: Jo shares 10 reasons for reaching for alcohol and exposes how drinking doesn't solve the problems you think it will, in fact it makes them worse.
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