I lost my husband ten years ago. He was the one who would say “I think we’ve had enough now, shall we have a cup of tea before going to bed”. Now I have no one to keep me in check. I knew I was losing control, although I was quite capable of presenting a positive front to everyone, including my family.
I realised I’d reached rock bottom when one Sunday morning I was making my first cup of coffee of the day and when I put milk into it, the milk curdled. So, I decided to have a vodka and coke instead and the first one turned into two and so on. By evening I had been drinking all day. I remember thinking to myself I’ll have to join alcoholics anonymous and went on line to see what was available in my area, then thinking, what if I go and someone recognises me. How I found the Gogetsober site is beyond me, I can’t remember, and I believe it found me.
On Monday, I was checking my emails and noticed an email from Gogetsober and the free trial on offer, I must have put my details in when I was drunk. When I logged onto it and checked the first module, the Blogs and Vlogs, I thought this must be meant for me, and I think my late husband must have been saying “I think you’ve had enough now”.
I did not have high hopes of success but decided I’d just give it a try. I’ve watched each step in Module 1 at least twice, and I have also read each step at least twice. At the end of the first week I began to think maybe I can do this. I found keeping a daily diary and re-reading it helped me to keep focused. At the end of the second week I began to believe I can do this.
In the past when I have given up alcohol I could not get to sleep and the more I tried the more I tossed and turned. Eventually, I’d return to drink. This time my sleep pattern returned to normal within a few days. I have wonderful night’s sleep now, more energy, I’m eating better, and my blood pressure has come down.
What do I see for my future. My attitude towards drink is altering and I feel more in control. I have plans for a family holiday in the summer and my wish is for this to be my first alcohol free holiday. This is a journey I could not do on my own and I am grateful for the support I have had from Gogetsober.
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